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Who can go through life without being criticized? Nobody! Yet very few people know how to respond to criticism appropriately or how to deal with it effectively. Since there will always be naysayers and backbiters, it's best to learn to live with them, become as thick as a rhino's skin and let their words bounce off of you.

Critics come in many forms. Constructive criticism is healthy and, in many situations, necessary. If we don't know what our weaknesses are, how will we ever grow or change? There is a difference, however, between constructive criticism meant to help (such as from protective loved ones) and unsolicited, negative criticism meant to hurt. Learning to decipher the two is the key. Don't shut down when you get criticized. Just because someone calls you a name does not make it so. Don't automatically accept the other person's comment as absolute truth. And don't build a case against yourself. It seems so natural to defend yourself or counter attack when you get criticized, but it doesn't work. You don't learn anything and you don't gain anything. The criticism simply escalates in intensity -- if you fight back -- inappropriately. You've got to resist the temptation to fight verbal fire with more verbal fire.

Perhaps it may help to think of your detractors as little helpers or teachers, there to keep your ego in check. The next time you come across one, thank them and say, "I hear you. But I'm good. Thank you for your concern. In other words, those who appear to throw us our greatest challenges can, in fact, be our greatest teachers.

Destructive criticism usually comes in the form of an attack, a character assassination, or a total put down. "You are a selfish pig!" "You are a disgusting person!" If you are ever at the receiving end of such criticisms, try to realize that there is something wrong with the critic, with the person dishing out those remarks, not with you.It is silly to take such criticisms to heart or to give them any credence. In essence, if a criticism is irrelevant, ignore it. If it is destructive and you can do so without getting into deeper trouble, challenge the critic by asking for specifics. If it's constructive, learn from it.You're going to get criticized in life. And you're going to get criticized at work. Just don't fight fire with fire. You're better than that.Remember: Think well, Act well, Feel well, Be well!