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You create a presentation that does not go well. You launch a product that only 10 people buy. Your relationship is over. You don't get the promotion or new job you really wanted. You get fired. You do something else, and feel like you've fallen flat on your face. Understandably, you're devastated. After all, you failed.But failure doesn't have to be a demoralizing letdown because failure is what we make of it.

Apparently, the best way to respond to failure isn't to try and rationalize why things went wrong, but to allow yourself to feel a little down in the dumps before you try again.Failure, in general, can be beneficial when an individual actually allows themselves to respond emotionally. This might seem totally counterproductive. What good does it do to beat yourself up when you don't succeed? But the key here isn't making yourself feel terrible — it's recognizing that sometimes, bad things happen, and you might have to try harder next time. Basically, researchers found that people tended to rationalize away their feelings of failure, telling themselves that the task was "not that big of a deal" in the first place. This might make you feel better about yourself, but it's not going to motivate you to do better next time. On the other hand, a growing number of psychologists emphasize self-compassion, which has been associated with quicker recovery from life events like divorce.Self-compassion requires that you acknowledge your failure in the first place. So next time you fail, embrace your emotions instead of suppressing them — then get back to work.

Once failure makes us more risk averse, it impacts our ability to think more creatively and to find solutions that are 'outside the box' because by definition, such solutions entail less certainty and more risk. Remind Yourself of What Success Would Mean to You. Recharge your motivation by reconnecting to the reasons you began pursuing your goal in the first place. Consider how you would feel if you succeeded, especially after having already failed at a previous attempt. Take Calculated Risks. Recognize that it is natural to feel anxious when considering less conventional options, but that it might be essential to do so. Create a list of all the various approaches you can think of, rank them according to the risks they entail and make informed and calm choices about which to pursue first.

So the next time you "fail," acknowledge the pain you're feeling, because failure does hurt on many levels. Sit with your pain. And after you've processed your emotions, consider how you can grow because your growth isn't finite. There's always more (and more) room to learn, discover and evolve.